Believing in God- Your Strength to Discovery

I’ve been fearful of God for a long time.  Why?  I didn’t feel like he would like me.  I had done terrible things.  I wasn’t taking care of myself and I was living in sin.   I let myself get out of control.   There’s no telling how many people I hurt along the way. However, I have asked for forgiveness.

When I was at my lowest point is when I met my maker.  I don’t really know why this time was different.  Maybe  I felt I had a purpose.  On a visit to Wilmington, NC to see my son talked seriously about my drinking problems.  He said, “Mom, “I want you around to be grandma to my children.”  I looked at him really surprised.  He had never being that serious with me in, well never!   I looked at him with tears streaming down my face and said, “I’ll try my best son.  It won’t be easy, but I will do it.”

It wasn’t easy.  I fought with the devil for a long time.  I started to hallucinate.  Things would come up missing.  I would see shadows.  I thought I was going crazy!  I started reading the bible asking for help.  Is all this a hallucination or was someone trying to talk to me?   At times when I was drinking, my Pomeranian would walk by me hanging his head and would briefly look up at me and keep walking.  He use to sit with me instead he went  to the back room.  I was getting a complex.  I actually believe Cody hated me smoking and drinking, and I also believe God was choosing my dog to communicate.  Really!   God does choose people, animals, and other sources to communicate.  He also whispers to you which is actually called intuition.

I read about intuition, and it says that when you hear a voice whispering “don’t sit that glass there,” and you do anyway.  The result – it falls on the floor and red wine ends up on your carpet.  Not a fun site.   This kind of incidents happened a lot to me so I began to read more about intuition, and started practicing it. To this day – sober and all – I believe that my faith in God turned my life around.  I have a lot of stories and this was just one of them.

Do you have a story you would like to share.

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2 thoughts on “Believing in God- Your Strength to Discovery

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