Tag Archive | believe

Intuition – Bipolar – High Sensitivity Personality


I realized the other day that strange things have happen to me since I was a young girl.  I’ve always been open to the possibilities of guardian angels, ghosts, psyches, and anything that hasn’t been proven it doesn’t exist. 

Yesterday, I saw or felt something sitting next to me and at first glance t was my son.  He lives in North Carolina. I sometimes see black shadows, and I’ll hear  voices. I never feel like I’m alone.  They’re times that items go missing.  I thought I was crazy!  Well I am, but this was something I had just had my had on.  I’ll look and look and then decide to just sit down and think about it and there it is.  It’s happen on more than one occasion.

I’m very sensitive to noise and sounds, chatter, and feelings. I can tell on the first introduction or meeting whether I want to know that person or not.  I can feel when a person doesn’t feel good. I’ve been told I have HSP – High Sensitively Personality-Psychic Intuition.

I’ve read that people with Bipolar like me are intuitive, because of their sensitive nature.  I’ve had these sense and feelings for a long time even when I was in the first grade I was top in the class in track.  When time to run I could tune out and focus on the starting line – there was no one but me heading for that starting line so run like the wind it’s you only you.  BLAM!  I’d take off like a blaze of glory.    I flew through the finish line YEA!  Know one could catch up and I knew I was going to win.  I got that feeling every time when I won.

When I started having these strange things happening to me I started studying intuition and believing, and that’s how I found my higher  power.

If you have sensitivity study it and learn.

What Does God Look Like To You?


When I was younger I always wanted to know what God looked like.  In the show “Moses” it showed God standing in front of a burning tree.  This scared me.  In Sunday School, I asked them what God looked like?  “He can be anything you want him to be,” she said.

I wanted God to be real.  I found a book called “God on a Harley.”  Yes, that’s right God riding a Harley.  The book is about a tormented woman who is in need of help and advice and meets God in a bar.  While I was reading, I pictured God in black leather   chaps, leather jacket, leather books and long black hair riding a Harley.

Today, I know that God can be anything or anyone you want him to be. I’ve learned that God’s spirit will work through someone else to let you know that he is watching you, and let you know everything will be alright.  I believe this. Why?  Because the unexplained has happened to me several times. 

At a depressing time in my life, I was having to give myself  injections of a drug that made me very ill.  I could hardly get out of bed and I felt life was getting shorter. I pushed myself to go to the library to read up on my disease when a black man approached me.  He laid his hand on my shoulder and said (shuddering), “You are in despair, I know.  God’s prayers are with you, and said that you’ll find your answesr soon and will be better soon.”  I was so amazed that chills ran up and down my body.  I told him thank you and walked away.

This may all sound wild, but it was true.   The words he said might have been a little different.  I just know that he was right- I’m better and life looks a little bit brighter.  Thank you God.

What does God look like to you?  I would love to hear.

Define Intuition


Stop Being a Prisoner-Break Free

Intuition is a big word for me since I believe in it completely.  Since I discovered Define Intuition and started practicing it my live as been a little bit easier.  I’m not so much living on the edge like I use to.  I’m a little more careful by listening to my instincts.

When you have a decision to make about something you weight each option to see which one would be best for you.  I believe most of us do that, because like me some women have a hard time making a decision.  Having Bipolar really doesn’t make it easy.

First, I read about Intuition and how we all have it you just have to practice.  I decided to test it.  One evening, I poured a glass walked over to the couch and set the wine glass down.  When I sat on the couch I noticed the glass right on the edge of the table and any movement it would have been on the floor.  I thought about this and an idea came to me.  I also realized I didn’t remember putting the glass down. The next time I sat the glass down first before sitting.  This worked!  Sounds easy?  It is if you listen to your intuition by taking the time to listen.  Most of the time we have a dozen items on our mind or we’re thinking of what we’re going to do next.  A lot of chatter – how can we hear with that?

I accepted God in my life at a late stage in my life.  I was a big drinker mostly a binge drinker, and I was too numb to hear choices in life.  I didn’t know I had a choice.  Then, I started praying and reading about life.   I finally figured out that we have control of what happens to us.  We have a choice.  A good choice or a bad choice.   I chose God, and to get my life together by taking control of it.  There are resources out there.  You’d be surprised  how you will change when you take control of your life.  Your dreams are out there. 

Just think – this all started with the word Intuition and learning what it is.  I believe it’s God or his Angels whispering to you.  God says follow and if we follow he’ll lead us to hope and a fulfilled life  that you never thought you would have. 

Me?  I’m still alive and working on achieving what I want in life.  It may be hard, but remember you have a  choice.

Learn how I did it next…

Believing in God- Your Strength to Discovery


I’ve been fearful of God for a long time.  Why?  I didn’t feel like he would like me.  I had done terrible things.  I wasn’t taking care of myself and I was living in sin.   I let myself get out of control.   There’s no telling how many people I hurt along the way. However, I have asked for forgiveness.

When I was at my lowest point is when I met my maker.  I don’t really know why this time was different.  Maybe  I felt I had a purpose.  On a visit to Wilmington, NC to see my son talked seriously about my drinking problems.  He said, “Mom, “I want you around to be grandma to my children.”  I looked at him really surprised.  He had never being that serious with me in, well never!   I looked at him with tears streaming down my face and said, “I’ll try my best son.  It won’t be easy, but I will do it.”

It wasn’t easy.  I fought with the devil for a long time.  I started to hallucinate.  Things would come up missing.  I would see shadows.  I thought I was going crazy!  I started reading the bible asking for help.  Is all this a hallucination or was someone trying to talk to me?   At times when I was drinking, my Pomeranian would walk by me hanging his head and would briefly look up at me and keep walking.  He use to sit with me instead he went  to the back room.  I was getting a complex.  I actually believe Cody hated me smoking and drinking, and I also believe God was choosing my dog to communicate.  Really!   God does choose people, animals, and other sources to communicate.  He also whispers to you which is actually called intuition.

I read about intuition, and it says that when you hear a voice whispering “don’t sit that glass there,” and you do anyway.  The result – it falls on the floor and red wine ends up on your carpet.  Not a fun site.   This kind of incidents happened a lot to me so I began to read more about intuition, and started practicing it. To this day – sober and all – I believe that my faith in God turned my life around.  I have a lot of stories and this was just one of them.

Do you have a story you would like to share.

Believing My Intuition Led Me to A Decision


Listen & Believe

I totally believe in intuition.  I accepted God in my Life 1 1/2 years ago.  Yes, I know why did it take you so long?   Good question.   I spent too many year waddling in self-pity and depression.  I was numb with alcohol.  But, one day I woke up and decided enough was enough.  My days were just going by me.  I’m a grandmother and I wanted to be a grandmother.  I asked God to come into my life and let him know that I will listen and I will follow.  I will put my life in his hands and give me comfort.

After that I started experiencing the oddest things that actually turned out to be miracles.  I wanted to believe.  I wanted to believe in God, Angels and miracles.  Miracles can happen you just have to listen to the voices. I read that it’s actually your intuition and it takes special ability – Listen.

I actually believe the whispers I  heard were those of God or Angels.  If you just stand still for a second and clear your mind  you will hear the whispers. To this day I believe because it has totally changed me and my thoughts.  When my intuition speaks I listen.

Recently, there was a decision to make that was stirring me crazy.  I’d reserved a duplex for 3 months in November, December and January in Wilmington NC at Carolina Beach  I thought the rent seem cheap enough except when I read the lease there was something that didn’t seem right.  My gut was twisting and turning.

For days, I obsessed about it – anxiety, heart racing,  and I couldn’t sleep!  I was driving myself crazy, along with those close to me.  My  gut (intuition) was telling me something, and I believe it was telling me to put off the trip.  I started writing the negatives and positives about the situation and something happen.   The answer will come in your writing and then you’ll feel better.  I put down the negatives and positives –

  • Too much money.
  • Didn’t know what the place looked like.
  • I had to pay utilities.
  • Pet Deposit.
  • Airline tickets.

and

  • Doctor appointment regarding my illness and might need to have treatments.

The negatives outweighed the positive.

I got my journal out and wrote all my thoughts down all the way down to my decision. When I got to the end I wrote out my decision, but it didn’t feel like me writing.

The decision was not to go. I felt so much better!  I will continue to believe in God and my power of intuition.  I will continue to listen carefully for those whispers.   You’ve got to believe and trust what you  hear and miracles will open up for you.

Miracles Do Happen – Just Believe


Praying_Hands020Remember in my last blog I said you just have to believe that a miracle will happen?  I got a phone call yesterday after some hard praying and talking to my angels.  I asked for help in guidance and sanity to find the money to help me work harder to pay for what’s coming.

I got a call from that angel in the name of SSI.  That’s Social Security Supplement Insurance.  I heard her say “You’ve been approved.”  I’ve been approved?  I asked her if she was kidding me?  No one calls you on Saturday from the Social Security place.  She , “I do.”   I almost started crying and told her she was what I’ve been praying  for and that today she was my angel.

Angel’s come in every shape and form.  Sometimes it’s just a whisper.  Today, it was a telephone call.  I must be doing something right.  She said I had been approved to start receiving supplemental income and then in a few weeks I will start receiving my Disability.

I have been living off my piggy bank, the money I make on eBay, which is that much, and sometimes my mom sneaks in my room and drops a $10 or 20 in the  piggy bank.

My phone had been turned off since I haven’t been able to pay it so I called my brother and asked it he wouldn’t mind calling my son for me.  But first, I told him the news.  All I got was, “Maybe I should try and get it.”   I think he was jealous for some reason.  It’s been that way between us for a long time.  I felt like saying, “Well if you want all my pains of osteoarthritis, bipolar, diverticulitis, hepatitis c and so on you can have it.”  My Dad asked me when I was going to start paying rent.  I’ve lived there for 7 months now as their caregiver – taking care of  both m and them then ask me for rent.

My loving mom asked me what I was going to buy first.  I said, “Ink for my printer so I can print out my invoices. Pay my sprint bill, so I can call my son,  pay my bankruptcy payment, take my dog to the vet, and then to the groomers.    Oh, I should buy some clothes that fit me.   All other monies is going in savings for a trip to see my son and grand babies for Christmas.

Just remember to always believe and just your instinct and believe in prayer.  Don’t give up!Praying_Hands020